Pride goeth before destruction, and an haughty spirit before a fall.

First of all..my sincere apologize for the lack of updates lately. The main reasons are … ‘body engine’ still slow after 2 days of MC last week and work load is increasing rapidly lately. Tired is the only word I can describe myself right now.

Anyway, I would like to share some food photos with you all here. These are what I had last week. The coffee shop is somewhere at the road side on the way to airport road. Hehe. My description very subjective? I cant help it. Hehe.

Basically, you can choose what you want to have in the soup. Meat, fish ball, fish eggs, frogs…and many more. Ya, you hear me right. Freaking frogs! Haha!

My choice very simply Bihun and fish balls ONLY. Even the cook looked at me one kind. Haha! What to do? I dont know how to eat mah.

This is the mee soup. With more food inside.

Oh, I must mention that this Ipoh Salted Chicken is quite nice. The taste very nice but the flesh too little. Haha!

This coffee also very famous with its toasted bread.

You all take a look and judge by yourself if the food are nice. My comments are not always right as I think I am quite choosy….

Ok, I promise I will write again soon….as now I am too tired and kinda sleepy….zzZZzzZZzzZZzz…

Rejoice with them that do rejoice, and weep with them that weep.

I was down for two days…diagnosed to have tension headache. Was experiencing headache since Wednesday afternoon at work. So after work I went to see the doctor at our panel clinic. I waited for quite long. First, the doctor asked me what had happened? I told the doctor I am having headache. Then, he asked me another two questions. Where do you work? What do you work as? After answering him, he told me, you work under stress for long hours everyday that’s why… So I was given pain killer and antihistamines which is supposed to make me able to sleep better at night BUT…ok here comes the BUT…BUT it did not work on me!! Damn!! The pain killer only could sustain for a short period of time and the antihistamines had me wake up for a few times in the middle of the night instead of sleeping soundly. In the morning I tried another dose. As I was given MC, I tought I could give it a try and most probably can have a good nap but hell no! I could not even nap properly. The headache was on for the whole day and whenever I tried to sleep my mind turned out to be very active and ‘messy’.

So last night, I decided to go back to the clinic again. The doctor gave me the stronger type of pain killer and also stronger antihistamines and also another MC. Well, at least last night I did not wake up intermittenly any more but still I woke up at 6am this morning. I actually did go to work at 9am today but I came back at around 3pm as I was not feeling too well. Then I had a short nap. Hmm… not a quality nap as… you know..you can tell if you are having a quality sleep or not. I think I got insomnia. HELP! =(

*****

p/s: Very weird. I was thinking of you earlier today and I got your sms later in the evening. Is that what we called coincident? But it seemed that we got nothing to talk about anymore. It did not sound like you at all in the sms. I miss how you used to care….

Generally Monday has never been a difficult day for me before. Previously I like Monday as I get to see lots of my friends in school after the ‘long’ weekends break. Well, you know, when we were still young, we were hoping to see our friends everyday so eventually the weekends were kinda ‘long’ to us.

As time passed by, I felt that weekends were not long enough. It was quite tiring to need to wake up early to go to school again after having much rest over the weekends.

During Uni days, I hoped that Monday does not come so soon as I wanted to stay home and spend more time with family rather than staying in hostel or the rented house at Uni area. Going for early lecture classes on Monday made me hate that lecturer as I need to get back to Uni on Sunday night instead of Monday. But thank GOD, I have a loving papa who pampered me a lot. He volunteered to send me to Uni every Monday morning no matter rain or shine so that I could watch my favorite TV show on Sunday night.

When I started to work, I started to hate Mondays as well. This happened when I started to feel fed up with the job. Especially when no one appreciated what I have done. I hate going to work and seeing the person I do not want to see.

Now, I am here in Penang. How I wish that I have a magic wand to cast a spell so that Monday is gone forever. I really feel so dreaded to go to work every Monday. Hence, every Monday, you will find me in ‘blur mode’ and being extra quiet as well. I feel that my lips are so heavy that I rather not to open my mouth. at all throughout the day. This is so serious that until a stage that someone actually comes to me and ask ‘Why are you so quiet? Is this the time of the month?’ Immediately I would answer ‘NO!!! This is just my MONDAY BLUE symptoms!’. Seriously, I am like a walking zombie on Monday but the funny thing is, I feel that I am ‘reborned’ again towards the evening and started to feel energetic. That is the main reason why I ended up working till 9pm last night!! Crazy me!

It has been a while already since I last sat down properly in front of the computer to blog properly. I admit that I have not been able to manage this blog well since I came to Penang in May. Previously was because I did not have a computer with me. Later was because I was too busy with work. I am at work almost 12 hours a day. No OT. It’s my own effort to spend more time to catch up. Hopefully I can be more independent soon.

Hence, this is the root cause of lacking in content of my dear blog. Although I do post some entries from time to time but I know…not much of proper content. They are mostly photos. I am just too tired to type a long entry full of words. Please do not get me wrong. I wish to. I really wish to share my life here with you all but I just could not make it…it is actually very stressed at work to force myself to achieve the target set by the Manager for the new hires.

As for tonight, I feel that this is the night that I should at least proceed to say everything at one go. So, I foresee this would be a long winded post. It’s either you choose to read on or you quit half way. It is fine. I am ok with that.

I am here in Penang for a little more than two months for now. Life is slowly to become better now. At least a little more stable now. I have my own room and own car. These are two most basic things that could actually help to make me feel a little more secure as compared to the first two weeks when I first came.

I am now also confirmed to be placed in that particular team. I started to work hard since then and slowly I manage to pick up a bit of the skills and the knowledge here and there from the seniors. I really thank GOD that I have helpful seniors in my team. They are not selfish with their knowledge and experiences at all. Most important of all they are friendly people.

Although they are quite good to me but I find that there is still a virtual wall between us. I did not quite realize it until I had a one to one session with my Team Leader last Friday. He said that I am hardworking and that is a good thing but he also wanted me to work smart. I understand that. Out of a sudden, he mentioned something like he felt that I still have yet to open up myself. I am still quite closed up as he could feel that there is a virtual wall around me. I kinda agree with him but at one point, I feel that I cannot take what he said seriously. To be honest, not only towards him but to any other people as well. I know this will certainly make those who treat me sincerely good feel sad as if I do not trust. Yes, in fact I dare not trust. I do not wish to be like this. It is something which I do unintentionally. I assumed this is because of my painful past. I am so scared that I will be hurt again.  That is why I build a virtual wall without noticing it. Now, tell me. Should I live my life unbuttoned? Open up and accept whoever comes to me? Or just continue to have a wall as a layer of protection around me. I really want to open up a little more, but I am scared. Please give me a bit more time to adjust myself. I promise that I will try.

Work wise, other than needing more time to learn up, pick up and be more efficient, I am kinda slowly getting use to the matrics which measure me from head to toe everyday. It is like I am tracked from head to toe. Even going to the loo will be tracked. Believe me not? You just have to.

I have been going to the same church every Sunday for quite a while now. Things seem to be good. Brothers and sisters from GOD’s home are friendly and good. Now, the problem is back to square one again. I find it hard to mingle around with them. Indeed, I tried and I tried hard. But still, when no one comes to me I will be alone. I am just real slow in making new friends and getting close to people I just get to know. Simple. One conclusion. I am scared to be hurt.  Unless that particular person approaches me first. Then I will stick to him or her. Other wise… Well, I know, I just need to unbutton myself…

I am still very clear that my aim to come here is actually to start a new life and have a better future. I should not just keep to the past. For now, it is a new month. I think I better start off with some goals to aim. Hopefully by the end of the month I have some achievements to share with you all.

Till then. So long!

P/S: How are you recently? I have not heard from you since you last sms-ed me on the day while I was on my way to airport to come to Penang. To say that I do not care anymore is actually cheating myself. Anyway, I believe that you are pretty good and just hope that when we get to meet again some day some where…we are still able to at least throw a smile to each other.

Therefore let us be grateful for receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, and thus let us offer to God acceptable worship, with reverence and awe;

This is what I had every morning at work. This is just a normal type of jelly with very mild taste. I really could not understand how can it be so addictive. Every morning without noticing it, I will be waiting for the lady from cafeteria to come to my cube with their trolley full of food, especially jelly. Although what they shouted ‘ was Coffee coffee..’ but to me, it is like they are shouting ‘jelly jelly..’. Hehe!

Ok now, I would say this is something which I think is quite addictive to me as well. This is my lunch for most of the day. I can have the same chicken chop for every lunch throughout the whole week. It is not a problem at all. RM4 ONLY! Cheap eh? Ha! But I know it is not good for health to always eat the fried oily food with high calories. That is why I sometimes skip and have normal economy rice instead.

Woohoo! I had this BBQ chicken chop rice at Secret Recipe with my colleagues today for lunch. We were having Ubuntu training. This BBQ gravy tasted very much like tomato gravy. But the rice quite nice though. Nah..nothing much to complain…RM10 per set including a glass of ice lemon tea. Cheap bah!!

Nothing much about this post. Just to share the food photos that I have bought from the Bon Odori event food stalls. Hmm…of all the food stalls, I think I am unlucky that’s why I have chosen the one that sales not-so-tasty food. Haha!

This is the Japanese fried noodles. Not nice. The noodles not properly cooked. The noodles are hard and cold. No taste. I think I can cook a nicer one compare to this. Hehe.

This is something like potato puff. Mashed potato dough wrapping the the curry chicken as the filling. I have forgotten the name but it is not so nice either and it costs freaking RM5 each piece.

Submit yourself therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.